September 2025

Best Practices

Member Discipline Is a Dirty Word! How to Take the Hot Seat Without Losing Popularity

In private clubs, few topics spark more discomfort and fear than member discipline. The idea conjures images of finger-pointing, gossip, and fractured relationships. But here’s the truth: when it’s done well, discipline is not about punishing individuals; it’s about protecting the culture that defines your club. And yes, you can take the hot seat without losing popularity if you approach it with empathy, clarity, and process.

The Goal: Protect the Culture, Not Punish Individuals

When a member’s actions threaten the harmony of the community, leadership must act. But action doesn’t mean punishment, it means preserving the standards that the membership expects. Every club has a unique culture, and part of leadership’s duty is to protect it. That means holding people accountable, but in a way that feels fair, not personal.

Reframe the situation for your members: “We focus on upholding the standards that make this club a place where everyone feels respected and valued.”

What You Can Say (Even When You Can’t Say Much)

One of the toughest parts of handling member conduct issues is the confidentiality required. Members will ask questions. Rumors will fly. And yet, you can’t disclose specifics.

But you can reinforce the integrity of the process. Here are key talking points:

• “When concerns arise, they’re handled thoughtfully, confidentially, and always with fairness. Our goal is to protect what makes this club great, not to embarrass or punish.”
• “This concern went through the proper channels, and the recommendation came from the committee, not me acting unilaterally.”
• “This decision aligns with our commitment to protect the culture our members have built.”

If someone presses for details: “I’m not able to share details out of respect for confidentiality, which is a key part of our process. We’d do the same for any member.”

Use the Process, Don’t Own the Outcome

This is key: don’t play judge and jury. That’s for your Member Standards Committee to address. The GM or club president’s job is to facilitate the process, not shoulder the consequences.

Positioning Tips:

• Reference the process, not the person.
• Speak about shared values, not individual failures.
• Emphasize principles and discretion, not drama.

Think of the committee as the firewall between leadership and perception. When you refer to a transparent, fair system, you depersonalize the decision and defuse controversy.

Words That Work (and Words That Don’t)

Words to Use:

• “Protecting the membership experience”
• “Upholding our shared expectations”
• “Addressing a serious concern with fairness”
• “Stewarding the values of our community”

Words to Avoid:

• “We had to punish someone”
• “They had it coming”
• “He crossed the line”
• “We had no choice”

Tone matters as much as content. Even justified actions can breed resentment if explained with harsh language. Stay on the high road, even under pressure.

The Backbone: A Strong Member Standards Committee

Your Member Standards Committee (MSC) is your most powerful ally. With a clear charter and trusted members, the MSC gives legitimacy to any corrective action.

MSC Charter Highlights:

• Purpose: Uphold values through peer-based, confidential review of member conduct.
• Mission: Preserve a respectful and inclusive environment by promoting accountability.
• Scope: Advisory only; the committee makes recommendations, not rulings.
• Membership: Balanced, diverse, and trained members who reflect the club’s values.
• Confidentiality: Non-negotiable. Breaches result in removal.

By anchoring discipline in a process that is objective, educational, and confidential, you protect members’ dignity and your reputation.

Bottom Line: You’re Being Protective

Handling member conduct issues doesn’t have to cost you popularity if you lead with empathy, structure, and discretion. People don’t need every detail; they need to trust that leadership is principled and fair.

Remember: Leadership isn’t about being liked in the moment, it’s about being respected in the long run.

If you model fairness, shield individual identities, and remind members that these efforts are for the greater good, you’ll not only avoid losing popularity, but you’ll also earn deeper trust.

And that’s how you turn a “dirty word” into a cornerstone of club integrity.

Submitted by Jeffery Murray, CCM, CAM, FMP, Senior Club & Community Consultant at Strategic Club Solutions

Insights

Three Big Influences on Private Clubs

Like the people who join them, private clubs are ever-changing. Three of the greatest influences on change in clubs are food and how members want it, golf and how people will use it, and women and how they have changed their clubs.

Everyone Eats

Dining and entertainment venues in private clubs are a platform for socialization…with food and drink. However, members’ preferences for dining experiences have changed in three significant ways:

• Al Fresco Dining Is Preferred – Open-air dining where either management has brought the outdoors in or taken dining and drinking outdoors is highly popular in most clubs. Regardless of climate, members like the idea of open-air dining, although they will express concern that “it is too hot (or too cold)”. Design professionals are finding tremendous solutions for dining spaces.
• Portion Sizes Are Shrinking – With America’s increased alertness to obesity and bring overweight, portion sizes are growing smaller. This step enables some operators to address margin imbalance on menus.
• Make Reservations Easy – Rising generations who have become accustomed to online reservations elsewhere expect their clubs to be easy-to-reserve, so clubs are using more online reservation capabilities more frequently. Usually, it is the most tenured members of the club who resist this trend and continue to want personal attention for making reservations. Most members have accepted the notion that reservations are advantageous to them.

Golf Is Evolving

Golf has experienced its greatest boom cycle since the days of Arnie’s Army and televised golf events. According to National Golf Foundation data, the pandemic era added six million golfers and golf in the US accounts for 528 million rounds played annually. Beyond the popularity of the game, growth has arisen from alternative golf options, such as 3-, 5-, and 9-hole short courses, putting courses, and golf training and game improvement technologies.

While some observers questioned the durability of golf after pandemic-driven out-of-office options were curtailed, play counts and golf viewership continue strong.

EVEolution Is Real

In her 2000 book, EVEolution, futurist Faith Popcorn predicted the growing influence of women in society. As is often the case, Faith was correct and in a big way for private clubs. Women notably influence their clubs’ activities, social calendar, governance, and facilities planning.

She advised, “the companies that do the best job of marketing to women will dominate every significant product and service category.” Beyond marketing in a private club, female members in most clubs have reshaped their clubs in three important aspects: governance, amenities, and socialization.

Insights by Henry DeLozier, Partner, GGA Partners.

External Influences

Podcast Spotlight: Tips and Overtime and Taxes, Oh My!

On July 4, HR 1, the 2025 tax legislation was signed into law. The measure features the extension of several expiring tax cuts passed in 2017 and new tax reductions including new federal tax exemptions for qualifying tip and overtime income. There’s a lot to unpack here for clubs.

In this episode of Let’s Talk Club Management, we’re joined by Brad Steele, J.D., a long-term collaborator, to talk more about what this means for the club industry. We’ll explore what we know about these two impactful changes and learn what details remain to be released with further regulatory guidance.